Broken Trust

Do You Have Any Suggestions As To How Long It Takes To Get Over The Broken Trust?

So talked to Desperately Anonymous the other day and she has a trust issue going on. Someone with mental illness has issues with trust. It takes them a long time to regain trust when it is lost. She had just become trusting with her partner when she discovered her partner lied to her and not by her partner telling her the truth. This was very disheartening to her. She is very upset. It was not a sexual thing at all.  It is just the fact that she was just becoming trusting and believing and now this. She even believed it was time to become intimate again.

Her partner had over a month to tell the truth since the incident.  At the time the story she was told sounded a little hinky but she had gotten to trust her partner so she said okay and continue on, never once thinking she was being lied to. It was said that she was lied to because someone else was there…but…she could have been told the truth immediately when that person was no longer in the vicinity or when they returmed home.

Never once was she told the truth and she had to find out by seeing it unfold before her eyes when unknowingly they had returned to the scene of the crime because her partner had not told her the truth thus they were confronted once again.  She stood there and just said “So you lied to me?!?”

I have a major trust issue as well with my mental illness.  Desperately Anonymous tells me that she doesn’t know how long it will take her to get over this.  How long would it take you? How long should it take? She tells me she makes sure every night her partner knows she loves them. She gives her partner a hug. A kiss good night. The usual night time routine a couple goes through but during the day there is not a lot of hugging, kissing, cuddling, etc. Could you? Would you?

With my own trust issues and mental illness I’m with Desperately Anonymous in that it would take me a very long time to regain that trust. I am a very open and honest person. That one quality I expect from everyone I know. If I don’t get it, I can’t have a mutual respect for that person and then that person is not a person I can have as a close friend and if you can’t have a close friend in your partner or husband in my case then what have you got? Desperately Anonymous I wish you a short journey back to your trust with your partner.

What would you do? Do you have any suggestions?

Take care and be well. Chauncey.

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